6.15.2005

Hobbies

What is it with men and their “obsessions” with things? Poker, video games, music, gadgets, etc. It seems that men get their “thrills” through things that they can do. I have yet to find something that excites me as much as those things excite my husband. Yes, we have scrapbooking and shopping and cooking...but aren’t those things sort of...necessary in the big scheme of things? I mean, we have to go to Wal-Mart because we have to buy groceries...sometimes I might pick up something I “want”...but it’s not because I went for that purpose. And I think that even goes with going to the mall. I mean, its sort of ingrained into us to shop for things we need...personally, I don’t really get my kicks from shopping...so I don't consider this a real answer to the question. And cooking...although there are MANY people who love to cook purely for the sake of creating something...for some of us its more of something we’ve learned to enjoy because, well, we have to eat. And...scrapbooking....is just a good, creative way to keep organized!

Maybe it goes with the whole, women are relational, men are ...visual? Don’t get me wrong, I love being around friends...but there is a certain vulnerability to making close friends. It takes work, work that I’m of course willing to do...which in turn allows me to enjoy my friendships more...but there’s something to be said about men’s “never ending story” as the RJ Show talks about.

There are, of course, things I love to do. For example, I listed some here. It just seems like the "never ending story" is a little different for men and women. Just another mystery of the sexes, I guess. I can definitely appreciate my husband’s love for these hobbies...I think he’s able to enjoy life a little more sometimes because he loves the new Coldplay album, or because he wins sometimes at poker. I’m not trying to be pessimistic, don’t get me wrong! I guess I’m just trying to find a good/real answer for the “so, what do you like to do?” question.

So...what do you like to do?

7 comments:

shauna 15/6/05 11:00 AM  

wow, I totally hear you on that!! there are certainly material things i like too, but overall, i love to enjoy the smallest things in life: warm weather, sunshine, pouring rain at night, music . . . so i do not understand the thrill with the latest/bestest/fastest/smallest/biggest "stuff". "guy stuff". it wears me out. i love life to be simple, and am often making efforts to have it so.
i understand my husband's pleasures to a degree as well, but i don't understand why men like material stuff, gadgets and so on.
do men embrace a beautiful sunset? do men revel in the beauty of little kids? do men notice the little things in life that make life so special???? i ask these questions, because a) i honestly don't know and b) i rarely encounter men who seem to enjoy life this way . . . perhaps i'm too sheltered or biased ;)
it seems men constantly have things on their mind that are related to poker, games, speed of any sort of motorized thing, sex, movies, the latest cds/dvds . . .

am i totally missing something?? am i totally misreading men????

Grant 16/6/05 12:48 AM  

Hey Virginia...long time, no comment..

halo - we kill bad guys, save the universe.

poker - we beat bad guys, save the universe.

movies - we watch good guys beat bad guys to save the universe.

football - the universe.

John Nelson 18/6/05 10:50 PM  

I think most men's hobbies (at least the ones listed here) are the way most men choose to enter male relationships. If a guy were to meet another guy and immediately start spilling his emotions and asking for hugs, that would freak most men (or women) out pretty quickly. So, we use other things to usher in friendships easier.

Poker: a game played with others.
Xbox: can play alone, but more fun in groups.
Golf: more fun when played with friends
Electronics: mainly communication devices (watch movies with others, talk on cell phone, keep appointments with PDAs, etc).

So, though we get excitd about the THING itself, it really is just a means to an end: male friendships.

Brett 19/6/05 11:33 AM  

Good attempt at justification, Nelson.

I for one can't stand people. I just like anything with microchips in it. Circuits, circuits, circuits!




(If you don't get the sarcasm in the above statements, then I guess you really haven't been around me enough... therefore, go buy some kind of gadgety communications device and let's talk!)

amy 19/6/05 10:51 PM  

well I don't have a husband- but i can say we woman can get off on stuff- but it all relates back to men!!! DO guys really like us as much as we like them? Does this make us the lesser of the sexes? This sucks!! Amy and Shelly

Virginia 20/6/05 4:42 PM  

Thanks for all the comments!

Yes, I know guys love gadgets, but I just don't get it. ;) Sure, Nelson, sometimes you can bond with your buddies over poker or halo, but I think Grant hit the nail on the head...you all just want to take over the world. ;)

Here's a good example of my thought process over this whole issue:

I don't get the same thrill over a concert that Andrew does. Don't get me wrong, I'm so excited to see Rascal Flatts this weekend in Dallas, but it doesn't define me. I really think I feel differently, like a different planet, than Andrew feels about seeing U2 or Coldplay. Those are somehow defining moments for him...for me, they're just a little perk in my week. See the difference?

He is "experiential" in a sense...which I can definitely appreciate. He gets giddy over rollercoasters and movies. I love that about him. But...there aren't many things that do that to me. Am I weird? Am I boring??? I don't think so, I think its just a Men/Women thing. Is there something in life that would do that for me? I think my "likes" are just different, and that's okay. I guess I'm just wanting to figure out what those things are.

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